A Hissing fly

Oh baby, you cannot ever die
who’s gonna feed my elderly mouth with a pretty spoon if you’re gone
I want you to be there
to wipe my overgrown gray bangs from my eyes
so I can see yours shine
and I know there’ll be no one to love my aging heart
if you’re stuck alone in the dark

When death comes knocking at our cabin’s door
I’ll start humming with Tankian’s words
and if you go, I wanna go with you
and if you die, I wanna die with you

At the party held in your honour
I won’t be caught wearing black
I won’t watch your casket be lowered down
if I’m not seeing it from below the ground

Might as well go missing then
drink the muddy trench water
and breath it in
carefully enough
so I don’t miss a sip
and I shall be born this time with big beautiful wings

The place frightens me
it’s way up there and I’m scared of heights
and what frightens me even more:
You once thought it would feel like home
I won’t be there, that’s for sure
and I’m so sorry, my love, but if you’d still call it home

My sweet mourning lamb, I’m never coming home

Let’s shoot our shot at love and see who falls
with bullet wounds
the other’s hand pushing down the gush of blood
for you I’d jump in front of a loaded shotgun
hoping any of my filth don’t get on you
let the last wind hit me with your vanilla scent
arms spread wide for my saviour to catch me

For you I’d try to be brave
knowing I’ve lost but it wasn’t all bad
because I got my moment with you
I’d wish at last
my body painted a heart
so you’d know even death couldn’t keep my love afar

You crave to know if you’re worthy of love
but I can promise you’ll never know if you don’t stick to find out
you won’t feel an ounce of my love from behind the border
eventually you’ll wake up with your eyes already open
then you’ll see the truth of your soul
the purity

I bet it feels heavy sometimes being you
that much good takes space to form
that much light radiates till it blows
I am sunbathing in your reflection
thank you for the warmth
before you I was so cold

This is a good life
with your sweet breath above the swaying blades of grass
I love you with a love that is yours to keep
a love that no one else will ever receive

As a granny with weak knees and a sore hip
I’ll be laying in a pure room on a white quilt
with the early sun dawning from the curtain gap
you’ll be right next to me already awake
filling sudokus with your Hello kitty pen
the same thing you did way back when

And the tune from our youth rings in the back
hey, do you wanna see the west with me?
Cause love’s out there and I can’t leave it be
so darling, we’ll be heading west
there we’ll sleep together at sunset

What will be left of us
I keep in a tin jar
when I lift it to my ear
I can hear your hissing sound