Hurts

I wish the days were back
when I only felt with half a heart
When love was hiding
in the dark corners of my bedroom,
sealed into the lies beneath my words,
concealed by the cotton layers of reality,
which was bland but it was mine

When dusk turned to dawn without a blink
Fears were as hollow as the joy within
Black and white were just shades of gray
and feelings were safe
under the numb taste of my herb of grace

Now my nights are sorry
and the mornings are cruel
My heart as fragile as the frosted window,
the beats of it numbered
by every breath that breaks it,
the cracks of it defined
by the days that hate it

The passion in me
flows as free as the tears
It breaks down barrages
and seeks out the sea
But it's swallowed by the waves,
and shattered by bulwarks
Gets washed out to the beach,
buried in the sand,
dried out by its grains,
sucked back into the stream of my pain

I am tired but sleep evades me
Although I'm hungry,
food only betrays me
Today tries to find me
but I live for tomorrows,
and if I let go of yesterday
it's the other side of my heart that dies
and it dies alone